I suck...

...at this. Well, let's be fair; obviously I am not trying very hard, so should I really say that I suck at it?

Yes.

EEERRRGGG!!!! What the hell is wrong with me??? Why can't I get going? Why can't I see that I am killing myself here? Why can't I care???

I want to scream and yell that I am trying, that nothing works; but it's not true. I'm not trying, and I don't understand why the hell not. I WANT to be thinner, I WANT to be healthier, I DON'T WANT to die an early weight-related death. I don't want to be "Big Auntie" any more; I want to be "Slim and Trim Auntie" instead. I want to be "Hiking and Biking, Iron Man Finisher Auntie", not "Come over and we'll order a pizza and watch a movie Auntie".

One of the sales reps I support always sends me cash at Christmas time every year. This year I went out and bought the original "Biggest Loser Workout" DVD. I bought it on Thursday; have I used it yet? No, but I plan to. I thought it would probably be the least "butt kicking" to start out with since it is the very first one they put out. We shall see.

I don't think anyone sent me any good diet vibes last week; please send some this week, and maybe a few workout vibes too. Please - I obviously need all the help I can get!

TTFN.